So, I kind of…
First, first – I’ve decided to now only post on Fridays at 11Am GMT. Use this website to help you figure out when it will be in your countries time… Thanks… *winky smiley face*
First of all, let me explain about my family. There’s my Dad, who is a marketing consultant, and my brother, who is the most annoying person (emphasis on ‘the’ so you read it like iambic pentameter — *shout out to William Shakespeare who coincidentally told the world about the two lovers Romeo and Juliet to the world yesterday ((???? Maybe??? I thunk.))*) you will ever have the misfortune to meet.
And my sister. She’s ok. I guess. AND THEN THERE’S MY DOG HES SO CUTE I JUST NOW REALLY NEED TO GO AND SQUEEZE HIM AND CUDDLE HIM.
And then there’s my mother, the oncologist consultant, and nutrition guru. She bought us cherry flavoured raisins and cranberries to get us to eat them. (to be fair though, I would have eaten them anyway, soooo….). Yeah, more about those things later. All my childhood snacks were — (what? isabel, you’re still a child – being 13 doesn’t make you a grown-up, but nor does it make you a child!) carrots and cucumbers and grapes – and sometimes carrots AND HUMMUS. Best day EVA!!!. And there was all my friends with their chocolate pancakes and their caramel rice cakes, and just me with my small tub of rabbit food, all hanging out in the toilets because it was horrible in the playground.
Yeash. Toilet food??? Ik – gross huh?
So, unsurprisingly I began to slowly rebel against my mother. I would leave three grapes in my tub, and face the consequences when I got home. Slowly, after a bout a year, I gained the courage to tip my snacks in the bin (yeah, big news huh?). Then we moved house. Now before I couldn’t reach the snacks, but now because the ceiling was higher we had to get a stepladder, and this opened up a whole new world.
The world of eating a whole packet of crisps. (AAAH! New blog post idea!) The world of eating those mini Smarties paper tubs under my covers at 8:30. Then I gained an account on the MacBook, and about a year after that I first took it upstairs (*we’re not allowed the computer upstairs, or any electrical device*), and watched instagram videos for an hour under the cover of darkness. Yeah, it didn’t really work out (damn, Isabel, leaving the MACBOOK OUTSIDE YOUR ROOM CHARGING AFTER YOU USED IT WASN’T A CLEVER IDEA WAS IT?)
Then, I took cereal upstairs, but was found out after my brother came and found three Smarties under my pillow. I HATE YOU TOO LAURIE YOU DO KNOW THAT!!! He ate two but the evidence was still there. Oh, brown Smartie, thou ist most terrible.
Then, to buy a Kinder Bueno, I took 60p out of the kitty, (a little pot of change we use, but no one even knows). Best Kinder Bueno of my life. So, then I took larger things, like Halloween sweets and Easter chocolate, and once two packs of dark chocolate (the wrappers are still in my sewing basket where they were hidden. I went crazy in Tesco, spending almost £2 at one time!! (I know – crazy :-O). So I thought over the summer holidays of 2016 – just saying, but that was before I knew about the U.S Presidential campaign, and I just got over Brexit. (I still cry my self to sleep – counting all the subheadings in Article 50 doesn’t help me get to sleep). Golly gosh! She really is writing about the olden days! *why children I remember when Apple brought out the iPhone 7000s. No way grandma! My, you are old!!*
And when I went back to school, I thought – let’s be healthy this term. And I bought a packet of Mars Bars. I tried, guys – I really did! I just couldn’t help myself. I cut down a bit, but then Halloween came, and I couldn’t stop. Then the Christmas Markets at my school, more sweets, and and then it was Christmas and I took a packets of M & Ms with me and had three each night.
I went back to school.
And had a traumatising experience with a girl from 8-5 who was pretty mean to me whilst walking to school on Wed 18 Jan. I sent her 3 texts on that day, one on Thursday, one on Friday, one on Monday, one on Tuesday — two on Tuesday, and one on Wednesday. Yet, our senior Tutor came to me and was like that wasn’t that nice was it and I was like its not like I spammed her phone. I sent her a daily text, and thought she was just not replying to wind me up — that’s the type of thing she would do. However, she shall remain nameless. And faceless. Her WhatsApp photo is of a man with watermelon on his chest. Yeah, see? No, but she was being pretty mean, and unloyal, and a hypocrite.
Then I walked with my other friends, and they lived beyond Tesco, and I stopped! So now, I have like a pack of Polos if I’m lucky – but I let myself loose when I go to Badminton – otherwise I’d implode.
Now, the first bit about raspberry-flavoured raisins. So, I was rooting around in the cupboard and found a pack of them, and two cherry. I thought they were testers that my mum brought home from when she went into Manchester. (sorry Rose, i revealed where you live. Thought Manchester’s pretty big right? It’s bigger than my house, so… Anyway Rose – you do not live in Manchester! Or Dunham Massey! Actually, you may, I’m not sure…)
I found these raisins and ate a packet, and saved the cherry flavoured ones. SO my mum came in and she questioned me. Turns out they were for my lunch tomorrow. (I’m writing this on Monday, but you’ll get it on a Friday). Yeah, the convo with my mum was awks.
Yeah, and then I ate my birthday cupcake in front of the TV and she came in HOLDING the packet that was in my blazer and said, ‘Why did you eat this?’ A bit like
And I was there like, ‘They looked nice(???!!!)’, and then I gave the other two packets back to her. And then I was banned from the computer – but I’m still on it anyway.
Okay, I’ve just checked in my lunch box, and the two packs are in there, so Mum was lying.
*BTWs, my brother just ran into the room properly threw his fish tank open and yelled at the fish, ‘Hello guys!’, and then he got his lego Shuttle out and asked me how many people it could seat and I said one and he opened it up and showed my 10 people sitting like this…
The O’s are heads. Yep, my brother asphyxiated his lego figures. I’m not even joking!!*
WINSTON JUST ATE DADS LETTER!!
Okay, rewind. Basically my dad quit his job to run his own business yesterday, and he spent all of yesterday basically meeting up with business managers to try and spread the word about his business.
And he’s going back today and wanted to send a letter down to London so he can get more job opprtunities and we went into the utility room and there as the letter, all over the utility room floor.
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P.S. Thumbs up if dogs are better than cats!!